I hate running.

So, today, I was running.

Don't ask me why.... Also. I'm sorry I never write new blogs anymore! I know all of my loyal friends have been missing me and wondering where the void in their lives originated. I'm sorry you two.

That was a good distraction wasn't it!

To the rest of you. You. If you know me at all you know I hate running. I truly think it's the Devil's work. I do it anyway. Mostly to get rid of fatness. Well today I was doing the Devil's bidding and all I could think about how much I hate running. People say all the time they love running, it's liberating, it makes you feel good, blah blah barf. My sister once told me that once you really get into it and you get a few minutes in it starts to flow and it gets easier... I'm still waiting for that to happen. I think she's a liar.

I hate running and let me tell you all the reasons why.

1. I get out of breath when I even THINK about running.
2. I have little legs. My legs have to move a lot more than normal people's do to make up between time and space.
3. I get bored. Really bored.
4. My hair bounces around. I look like a horse, but oh no, not like a majestic running horse, I look like a horses butt.
5. My skin gets really red when I work out. It's embarrassing to me for some reason. I look like a tomato face.

Stupid. I hate running so much I don't even like when other people run. It makes me feel bad about myself for being so lazy and such a terrible runner. I always have the urge to yell at them. I'm not kidding... Yesterday this man had been running for 87 minutes! That's almost an hour and a half! I felt like he did enough work for the both of us... I almost left!

I don't run outside. I hate the cold and I don't like to bundle up because it's takes more energy (that I don't really have) just to already do something I dislike. 

I also hate lifting weights, the bike, and the stair master.... Pretty much exerting my body in any way. Ugh. But! Today was butt day. At least I got something good going for me!

2KXIV - Wait... Do people still say 2K?

Happy 2014 Nerds!

I recently brought in the New Year (you can thank me later for doing you this big favor) with the most amazing woman to ever walk the face of this planet - Me!

Just kidding... although this is how my thought process went.
-Are people gonna understand that's a joke?
-Wait... Yes, me! I am important
-I need to start treating myself better
-Sarah B, don't be that person who writes a whole self help post about loving yourself
-JILL!

Back to the point! I spent my NYE with my best friend. She's pretty awesome and I feel bad for everyone who doesn't know her. I'm going to be the Maid of Honor in her wedding (that really has nothing to do with NYE, I just wanted to brag for a minute).

We spent the night celebrating in style, no better way to end the year than doing the same things you did all year. And by in style, I actually meant, we wore sweat pants all day, got dressed up for our party, and ended up changing back into sweats at about 10:30. We went shopping, went out for lunch, painted our nails, watched Pitch Perfect, baked cakes, then got ready for our fabulous extravaganza! For those of you who don't know, the definition of Extravaganza (n.) - going to someone's parents house to sit around playing games that test your knowledge of useless information and hanging out on the couch.

I loved it. It was perfect! I love her. She's perfect!

Really though, what I wanted to talk about today are New Years Resolutions.
1. What is the grammatically correct way of saying this. Shouldn't it be New Year Resolutions - because it's a New Year, not a New Years. Or is it New Years Resolution - like you're only making one resolution?
2. Stop judging me

I love when people make resolutions for the new year (<--- problem solved)

First, just because it's the beginning of the year you're going to make some awesome change in your life? Good thing it wasn't important enough to start the moment you realized you needed a change.
I make my resolutions on my birthday every year (I don't really follow through with those either lol)

Second, the gyms are full of either A) people who have absolutely NO idea what they're doing. or B) narcissistic college kids. Neither group stays longer than 2 weeks. Glad that gets resolved quickly!

However, I did decide to make a couple of Resolutions for 2014. They came about during conversations with some friends, so I'll share those with you. You're welcome

Learn a new awesome skill: Cat whispering. Teaching. Cleaning. If you have any suggestions please leave them below.

Me- I'm not going to lose any more weight. My new goal is to gain weight
Jill- Yes! It's so much easier than losing weight
Me- My goal is to weigh 200 pounds
Jill- Perfect!
Me-... no... 250 pounds... it's something to work for
Jill- Right! That's a real goal
This is why she's my best friend. She's so supportive!

Me- I've decided I'm not going on any dates in  2014
Jac- .........
Me- that's the pathetic person's way of justifying being single isn't it
Jac- Hey, it's a good goal. You end up with a boyfriend... good job. You don't... you achieved your goal!

This is my brothers FB status and I think it perfectly explains my attempts at any resolution.

Why do people keep saying it's time to make new year's resolution?! It's kind of stupid really. "New year's resolution: start eating healthier" First day: ate salad, drank water, ate fruits, Avoided cookies and cakes. I can do this! Next day: stuffed head in batch of cookies....

2014 is gonna rock!

Jill and I at Buffalo Wild Wings eating lemons instead of putting them in our water. Solid life choices.